Fertilizer Stick

My teaching teacher loves extended metaphors. Two days ago, my class heard a spiel on how teaching children is like making a peanut butter sandwich. Today, we discovered that lesson plans are like a tree, complete with a corresponding drawing. Generally, the longer and more elaborate these metaphors get, the more ridiculous they are. At the mention of students being the fertilizer stick (what the heck is a fertilizer stick, anyway?), she illustrates her point. As it turns out, at least according to the crude drawing, a fertilizer stick looks like a penis. Immediately, I flashback to sophomore world history class where Randie's chalk rendition of Africa also looked particularly phallic.

Of course, I can't laugh. I'm going to be a teacher, I can't allow myself to giggle each time I see something that resembles a penis. Covering my mouth to conceal a smile, I glance around expecting to see a more mature crowd around me. Instead, I notice the majority of my peers, many of whom are significantly older than me - married and pregnant - are doing a worse job of containing themselves. That's right, a room full of people who will be in charge of their own classrooms in just two months are chuckling and whispering to friends about the cock-and-balls shape scrawled on the board.

This proved to be a reassuring experience for me. Others might take another perspective.

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