2005-12-10

Blind Justice

Some of my friends are heading a political journal on campus, and they're looking for submissions that somehow relate to national policy. After contemplating topics for a while, I stumbled on to my brilliant idea: It's time our government banned seeing eye dogs. Why should my taxes go to buying someone else a pet? You don't see Uncle Sam giving me the parakeet I've always wanted. Furthermore, I hate being in public buildings and having to endure the smell of dog. You know how sometimes dogs have that scent... of dog? It's gross. Clearly, I'll have to develop this argument a bit more.

Wait, I have a better one. With so many American people unemployed, why are we providing work for pooches? Let's give this job to citizens and title it "Seeing Eye Professional." Frankly, sight is a skill that even the most incompetent of individuals possesses. (Well, except for the blind, but I digress.) Now, good-hearted American folk will lead our visually challenged to the bathroom and supermarket; leashes will be optional, flea baths mandatory.

Vote Kevin, '08.

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