In Bed

After inheriting the California king size mattress, I similarly inherited a set of red sheets from a friend. Up until that point, I was merely wrapping myself in a blanket atop the mattress, so the sheets were much appreciated. The sheets' material, however, was undesirable in that it attracted and retained an unnatural amount of dust and hair. At first I thought it occurred because I am particularly dirty, but I learned that some fabrics are wont to have fuzz and the like gather on it more than others.

Periodically, I would wipe the sheets, only to have the dust accumulate again within the day. Having dogs didn't help the matter, as they would shed all over the place. A month ago, I bought a big lint brush and Katy and I spent nearly two hours rubbing the undesirable material off my sheets, resulting in the dust ball pictured above. Within two days, you wouldn't have been able to tell we had ever de-linted the mattress.

Today I finally had enough of sleeping in such a grimy environment and decided to treat myself to brand new sheets. Though sheets aren't particularly expensive, when you buy a set for a California king mattress, they run at about $100 a pop. As I roamed the linen store while mentally preparing myself to spend that amount, I found that certain colors and styles were severely discounted. Ultimately, I located a set of nice sheets at nearly 70% off, most likely because they are a strong solid brown color. I was attracted to them for three significant reasons: they're ugly and thus funny, they're the color of poop (no visible skid marks!), and, duh, the price.

Then I started chickening out. My large concern was that this purchase would be stupid since this brown color wouldn't match anything. It didn't take me long to remember that I've never attempted to match or establish a color scheme in my entire life. Furthermore, there is no decor in my room for me to even worry about matching, aside from Brandon and the Mariachi Sundays sign.

So now I have new, comfortable brown sheets. Come poop on them, if you'd like.