Out of Order

My sibling, Laura, and I went out to dinner tonight. Laura got stuck in traffic, so for a while it was just Alison and myself sitting at the table. I shared that it would be funny if we had just been pretending that a third person was coming to hide the fact that we were on a date. Like every time I bring up something incestuous, Alison was disturbed. If this denial persists, I fear this relationship won't succeed.

When Laura finally arrived, she asked what I was planning to order. I pointed to the tortellini and chicken gratinati; she glanced at it, declared that it sounded good, and shut her menu. Wait! She can't do that! That's my order! I hate when people do that! I had made up my mind long before she arrived, and she just waltzed in and stole it; she didn't even try to find something else on the menu.

The server returned and Alison seemed pleased to verify that we were not together. Naturally, when it came time to order, that "ladies first" bullshit applied, and Laura was able to declare, "Tortellini and chicken gratinati" before me. Great, now I had to be the copycat. I had to give the faux cute, "I'll have that, too." I had to be the one that doesn't seem original enough to select my own meal. The server smirked, I could sense the judgment. Flustered, I blurted out that I had chosen it first, as a point of clarification. Unfortunately, I made the statement just as the server inquired whether I wanted a salad, and either the server didn't catch what I said or pretended not to, instead giving me a confused stare. Now I looked extra stupid. And it's all because someone couldn't order her own freaking dish! Gahhh!!