Indecent Proposals

Happy Valentine's Day! Looking to turn your current relationship into a lifelong burden? I'm not all that romantic, but I can tell you how three people I know proposed. I'm leaving names out of this post for reasons that will soon be obvious, but I swear that these are true manners in which couples became engaged.

1. Guy proposes with, and I quote, "I'm going to marry the fuck out of you!"

2. Couple does ecstasy together. Unpremeditatedly, guy proposes.

3. Guy kisses his girlfriend in the morning, then says, "Ew, you have bad morning breath, go rinse your mouth out with some Scope." Girlfriend goes to the bathroom and discovers an engagement ring sitting on top of the mouthwash!

Just thinking about these proposals makes me swoon! All three couples are still together, by the way, so if you're looking to have a successful engagement, you might want to consider one of these approaches.