Mother Nature has a dirty sense of humor. How do I know this? Look - or smell - no further than the Bradford Pear.
In college, we affectionately called Bradford Pears "cum trees." When they bloom in the spring, they emit the distinctive smell of semen. As if we didn't face enough of that odor in the dorms, it was always unpleasant to get a sudden whiff of that outside en route to class or the dining hall.
Since our arborist had a peculiar sense of humor (you learn these sort of things at a small college), I always figured that he planted the cum trees for kicks and that no one else would choose to plant these jizzy stink bombs.
My section of Los Angeles, however, is all about filling the air with ejaculate, apparently. The sidewalks of the main street are lined with Bradford Pears. From a visual perspective, I understand: when the trees bloom, they are beautiful to look at. But no flower is pretty enough to supersede the fact that the community now smells like a spent condom.
3 comments:
Those trees are all over my campus as well. And they 'spit' or the bugs on them do, something on you as you walk by.
Don't be a jackass, visually, they are stunning in the Spring. Besides, their bloom time is over very quickly. Tell us again how you are so familiar wth the "jiz" smell? Jerk.
@Anonymous- Shut up. These tress are goddamn nasty. We have over 10 planted in front of my college along the walkway. We have to hold our breath while walking to the building. And, I heard a lady well into her Fifties say the SAME THING. They smell like semen. End of story.
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