Licked

From the moment I met Darby, I identified em as a licker. Though the puppy has been with us for just over a year now, Darby's licking habit has not subsided one bit. Darby will lick me incessantly until I finally push em away, not wishing to drown in saliva.

While laying on the kitchen floor Friday night (there wasn't anything more pressing to do), in my vulnerable position, Darby predictably approached me and licked my face. In that moment, I declared a battle of wills. With enough determination, certainly I could last longer than Darby, allowing him to lick until ey finally got bored or literally tired emself out.

For the first five or so minutes, we both held strong. As I laid there, barely flinching, Darby went to town on my forehead, occasionally dousing my hair and making quick trips to visit my ear canal as well. Darby showed no sign of stopping, but it couldn't last.

During the following five minutes, Darby must have decided that my ear was delicious, since ey lapped his tiny tongue deep into my ear repeatedly. I squirmed each and ever time but resisted the urge to actually restrain em. Those tongue muscles must be aching by now, so I wasn't going to quit now.

Finally, a noise came from the other room, grabbing Darby's attention. Sure, it was a cheap, though unintentional, diversionary tactic, but if it meant me persevering, I'd take it. Upon hearing the noise, Darby lifted eir tongue from my face for all of three seconds before deciding it was not as exciting as continuing to soak my head. I couldn't help but clench in frustration as the tongue met my eyebrow again.

I did my best to hold out, for what felt like half an hour, before the process began feeling a bit like Chinese water torture. As much as I didn't want to admit it, Darby got the best of me. Dampened, I stood up, and checked the clock. Darby had licked me consistently for nineteen minutes, only pausing once briefly.

I love my little spastic Darby, but ey might love me more.