Bear Butt

Our house's adorable adogable puppy Darby is a chewer. In pursuit of eir oral fixation, Darby gnaws on everything he can get his mouth on: toys, plants, the couch, etc.

Somehow, a cute teddy bear showed up in our house without explanation. Inevitably, the bear became a dog toy. Returning home one day, I found the teddy bear with a gaping hole in its butt, much of the stuffing pulled out. Otherwise, the bear remained unscathed.

An hour later, Shea returned home and also noticed the bear had been violated. Holding the bear up, Shea asked, "Did a dog do this?"

Madison and I exchanged "well, duh!" smirks to one another.

"No, Shea," I said matter-of-factly. "It was me."

Shea crinkled his face.

"Yep... I'm a pervert," I added.

His look of confusion warranted a clarification.

"Of course it was a dog!"