Don't Cry - There's Milk!

I had a pretty emotionally tumultuous day after having to involve myself in a student's messy home life. Obviously, this is not the appropriate forum to discuss those matters, but suffice it to say that it certainly took a toll.

On my way home, I stopped at a grocery store that is going out of business; today is the last day it is open. I shopped there a few weeks ago because of the immense savings: most things were at least 25% off. You know I can't resist a good deal. The funny thing is, in the past, my cheapness at this very same location almost cost me my life. During the summer, I was at the store with Christina and Stacy when the special discount rack caught my eye. Oblivious to my surroundings, I managed to step right into a puddle of lotion next to the rack and promptly lost my footing. In an attempt to prevent footing, I did the whole comedic flailing off the arms and sliding of the legs for a ridiculously long time. As my head wobbled, I spot my friends with their mouths wide open, chuckling at what I'm sure must have been an amusing sight. After probably three full seconds of slipping about, I grab onto a cart and successfully regain my composure without ever falling. Only then do I realize what a mistake it was not to take the fall and earn myself a sweet lawsuit. There was no Caution sign to be seen: I could have settled for a huge amount of money or, barring that, all the bacon I can eat. Now that the store is going out of business, however, I must acknowledge that there probably wasn't much to gain from taking that fall.

I entered the store but the shelves were absolutely bare. As if I wasn't upset enough after the events at school! Clearly, others had taken full advantage of the discounts and bought everything left in the store. The only things still in the store, and this is not an exaggeration - these were the last items: greeting cards, 90% off store brand heartburn prevention medication, and about one hundred gallons of milk. Because the heartburn medicine was so cheap, I contemplated it, finally deciding to just purchase the product I would use, the milk, grabbing a gallon marked as 25% off. By the time I was nearly at the register, one of the employees said, "Get another one, it's free!" So I walked all the way back to the other end of the store, excited at the prospect of Buy One Get One Free milk. After my long trek, I arrived at the register. An employee asked, "Do you want a bag or something?" "No," I said. "Well then just take it, it's free." "Free free?" I asked. "Yup."

You wouldn't believe my uncontrollable smile. The store was actually giving milk away for free. Two per customer. I felt like I won the lottery. I called everyone I knew, except for Sabrina.

Suddenly, all of the intenseness from earlier in the day was erased. Free milk just might be the best thing to happen to me in a long time.