2011-03-08

The Princess and the Pea

"The Princess and the Pea" makes no fucking sense.

In his search for a wife, a prince sets up a ridiculous test which involves putting a single pea beneath twenty mattresses. A "real princess," he decides, will be able to feel the pea and have difficulty sleeping as a result. He finally finds a princess who complains of being bruised by the lump in the mattresses, and promptly proposes to her.

Nothing about this woman makes her an ideal mate. She's a whiner and probably an insomniac to boot. Plus, anyone who can feel a pea through that much material is obviously extremely frail. When she has children, they will almost certainly be weaklings after inheriting her willowy traits.

What kind of man wants a woman who is hypersensitive to even the most miniscule protrusion while lying in bed?

Wait, I think I just figured this fairy tale out. It's not really a story about a princess and a pea, it's a story about an insecure prince with the world's tiniest penis.

1 comment:

Lena said...

To be fair the pea in the bed thing was his moms idea right? And she seemed like a drinker to me, even when I was a little girl.