A Note to My Future Biographers

"He put on his shoes. After taking a few surprisingly breezy steps toward the door, he realized that he had forgotten that he wasn't wearing his pants yet. So he took off his shoes, put on some pants, and put his shoes back on again, a little less confident about taking on the day."

Note to my future biographers: no book about me would be complete or accurate without this passage. You might also want to mention that I actually go through this routine every few days or so, but I'm clearly in no position to tell you how to do your job.