2009-03-05

The Benevolent and Protective Order of the Elks

My social life isn't all it used to be, so I'm considering joining my local Elks club. Ahem, I mean the Benevolent and Protective Order of the Elks.

If I can prove I am a god-fearing US citizen (take that, you silly fence hoppers) and am willing to undergo an "indoctrination program" along with my spouse, I just might be approved to participate in their secret activities, which, according to their events calendar, seems to consist mainly of eating, bingo, and karaoke.

As if that were not enough, I'd also get to hobnob with these esteemed elks:









































(In order: Leading Knight, Inner Guard, Lecturing Knight, Secretary, Tiler, Treasurer, Esquire, Chaplain)

I'm not sure how long it takes to get a title, but I plan to dream big and go for for EXALTED RULER:



















Look at that bling!  Who's with me?

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