Well, I finally finished a side project I have been working on, The 100 Funniest Moments on America's Next Top Model. It generated a following of mainly ANTM fans, but I contend that you don't even have to be a viewer of the show to enjoy a lot of the best parts. (Hint - they rarely have to do with actual modeling.) For that reason, I wanted to share video clips of my personal top 3 moments with my general readership.
Here is footage of the bar brawl responsible for one of my favorite catchphrases of all time: "Bitch poured beer on my weave!" Tiffany gets into an argument with girls who the show captions with flashing red text as "not models" (and then blurs their faces - who has time to look at non-models anyway?) and the fight escalates to the point of broken glass, blood, and yes, sopping wet hairpieces. When one of the other girls chastises Tiffany for resulting to violence, she responds, "That's great, Martin Luther King, but hey, I'm with Malcolm… Do unto others as I'mma do unto you!" Television gold!
It's generally believed that you don't have to be smart to be a model, but Kathleen proves that their might be minimal intelligence requirement. When she's asked to pose as an anti-fur activist, she doesn't understand the concept in the slightest. And if you can manage not to laugh aloud at her ignorant views on how fur is made and the judges' subsequent critiques of her ("I do worry about Kathleen. You kind of want to take Kathleen home and look after her." "I don't!"), then you're a more restrained person than me. She may be one of the dumbest (but likable!) people ever on reality television, and that's saying something.
(Skip to the 4:40 in the video if you don't have patience to watch the whole thing.)
There's never a good time to develop a mysterious skin disorder, but the worst time is probably during a modeling competition when you need to look your prettiest, which is precisely what happened to Michelle. Though it winds up being a harmless case of impetigo, that doesn't stop the other girls from diagnosing her with a "flesh eating bacteria." Seeing the girls devolve into hysterics is a hilarious example of how rumors compound and people are prone to overreacting.
Check out the ANTM Funny blog for extended commentary and 97 other amusing moments.