Naked M&M

Dear Mars Incorporated,

As a Christian father, I am outraged at your latest commercial portraying an M&M in a state of undress. I generally monitor the television my children watch, but didn't think there'd be any offensive content in an M&M commercial. Imagine my shock when I heard my young daughter ask, "Daddy, daddy, is that M&M naked?" My daughter is not yet at an age where I can explain anatomy to her, let alone candy anatomy.

This same ad also features a song by the band LMFAO. I would like to notify you that I researched this series of letters by typing it into Yahoo and found that the phrase this acronym stands for includes not one, but two curse words.

Unfortunately, I cannot make my daughter un-see a male M&M gyrating nude beside a female M&M, but I can help her to never think of it again by no longer giving her M&Ms. If I were looking to corrupt my children with candy, I'd buy the suggestive-sounding Skittles, or Mike & Ikes, which appear to promote a homosexual agenda. Meanwhile, until this naked M&M scandal is resolved, I will be providing by family with something else that melts in their mouths and not in their hands.

Disappointed,
Ronald Jackson

P.S. If the people who do your commercials are the same guys who make those the ads about bears with toilet paper stuck to their butts, please tell them I'm disappointed in their obscene content, too.