Body Wash

Look, I'm not a fan of gender norms. Tell me how a man is "supposed" to act, and I'm prepared to have an hour-long debate with you on the topic.

But there's one thing I just can't get behind: Body Wash. Is there anything less manly? What's wrong with a bar of soap? And don't get me started with loofahs. You're essentially washing yourself with a puffy, colorful flower. Did you know it's actually impossible to wash your balls with a loofah? It's true because if you're using a loofah, you must not have testicles.

My roommate has this bottle of body wash in our shower that loudly declares "MEN." Bullshit. Soap is soap, but admittedly, it's a good marketing strategy because they need to trick men into thinking it is an acceptable product for them.

What gets me more is that it bills itself as having a "classic masculine scent." What the hell is a "classic masculine scent" anyway? A fart? Because the first thing I think of is a fart. Maybe mud? Every "classic" male odor that comes to mind is a filthy one, so I don't know why I'd want that to be a part of my personal hygiene.

No thank you.


Gay LDS Actor said...

I'm actually allergic to some bar soaps and they tend to dry my skin out. I use body wash because it seems to work better on my sensitive skin and doesn't dry me out so much.

classy lady said...

well, "Gay LDS Actor" sho wasn't fucking around when he thought up that screen name.

But RE: this blog entry, soap is soap. But I normally only use the orange Glo stuff mechanics use to get oil off they skin. It's real abrasive, like it should be.