2010-02-11

Snuggle Bear

There’s something off about the Snuggle Bear, no? Aside from being gayer than the average bear, even.

Shhh, the coast is clear!


He’s a bear who likes to hide in your home, sniff your clothes, then touch/cuddle you when you least expect it. Last I checked, there are laws against this.

Does anyone really want to swim in a tub of Snuggle’s “crème”?

That woman is about to get the surprise of her life. While she has her eyes closed, Snuggle hangs a “Do Not Disturb” sign on the door and gives us a knowing wink. He can use “snuggle” as a euphemism, but that doesn’t make it less of a rape.

When I was a kid, my first teddy bear was actually a Snuggle Bear. No kid should have a sex offender as a toy, but at least Snuggle seemed to have a taste for unsuspecting housewives rather than pedophilia.

Ohmguh, stay away from that baby, Snuggle! I suspect that some therapy sessions might help recover some sordid memories.