More Pregnancy Drama

Since I posted about my pregnant students, everyone's been asking me about the situation. On several occasions, friends have asked if I can finagle my way into a godparent position. The answer: not likely, especially after Mommy stopped speaking to me altogether.

You see, it all started when I thought it might be cute if I had the class' most intimate couple read the title roles in Romeo & Juliet, so I asked if she wanted to read the part. Mommy dearest got rude with me, saying she can't read since she's pregnant. Finding this absurd, I countered, "So what, as soon as you get pregnant you can no longer read?" "Yup!" she responded proudly and defiantly. Apparently, literature will be the new type of pregnancy test. No need to pee on a stick, just pick up a book and see whether you can still read it.

"That's not true, you don't have to read aloud, but you do have to read silently."
"I can't," she snapped. "I'm pregnant: all I can do is eat and sleep!" "If that's the case, don't bother coming."
"But I'm pregnant!" she screamed.
"Just get out of my classroom," I commanded.
"I SAID I'm fucking pregnant!"
"Get out," I repeated.
"I'M PREGNANT!" she screamed again, once more using it as a clutch.
It's my turn to scream. "GET OUT!"
She started sobbing and runs from my classroom.

For as long as I've known her, she's been rude, and it seems like she's finally found a nearly airtight excuse to justify any behavior. That said, I wasn't about to stand for blatant disrespect and disregard for education; being two months pregnant is hardly an excuse. In theory, no, I don't want to be kicking pregnant people out of my classroom. This theory was the same one my class held leading to near mutiny.

"How can you kick out a pregnant girl?" "You can't do that to her!" "Don't you even have a heart?" "What if you stressed her out and gave her a miscarriage?"

I lost all control of the class and had to push through trying to appeal to a decidedly unreceptive class (including Daddy) for another hour.

When Mommy came back the next class, I heard her tell another student how everyone in the office was nice to her and told her that since she was pregnant, she didn't have to do anything she didn't want so she's not going to give a fuck about what I tell her to do anymore. I don't know how true this claim is, but seeing as the administration has been largely unsupportive of dealing with these kids in the past, it wouldn't surprise me much if it were true.

She didn't tell me anything, however, instead giving me the silent treatment. Frankly, I prefer that to her constantly giving me lip, so I didn't make an issue of it. When I'd speak to her, she'd ask her beau if he heard anything. It was extremely childish, which I suppose isn't all that surprising, given that it's coming from a child.

By the next class, however, Mommy was at least momentarily forgetting her grudge. She had just received her first ultrasound and was sharing the photos for the first time with Daddy. Though Mommy was told it was too soon to know the gender, Daddy looked feverishly for a penis on the white blob. Mommy then shared the photos with me and asked if I even knew what an ultrasound was. Just before explaining that I've had ultrasounds before, I caught myself and realized that she would probably think I was crazy, full or shit, or a woman (all of which are synonymous, I know).

While I still fear this whole ordeal will go awry, I couldn't help but smile at the ultrasound and feel a bit warm and fuzzy about it, too. Sure, it doesn't look even remotely human yet, but tickle me Juno, I find it adorable. I'll probably keep being a bit sentimental about it until the next time the parents curse me out.