Commie Bastards

Allison and Stacy have neighbors that are Communist organizers. It's funny to think that that over the course of a few decades the term "Communist" in America has gone from the ultimate insult to just another way of describing an alternative lifestyle like "bisexual" or "vegan." Granted, in some communities, these are all four-letter words, but the Red Scare is pretty passe in the mainstream where hating Middle Easterners is all the rage.

At worst, Communists are nuisances. In my friends' apartment building, the Communists regularly hold organizational events; invariably, these meetings evolve into raucous nights of music and imbibing. Or as Stacy and Allison cleverly call such an evening, a Communist Party Party. I never really thought of Communists as partiers, but I suppose so long as everyone's having an equal amount of fun and doing the same amount of shots, it could work just fine.

I spoke to a tired Stacy on the phone today. Evidently, she was kept awake until 5 am by last night's Communist Party Party. It's highly amusing to listen to a contemporary earnestly give a disgruntled rant about those damn Communists, like ey is my grandparent in the 1950s. It's a little known fact that Senator Joseph McCarthy started stirring up shit about sympathizers after a self-identified Communist neighbor blasted Elvis tunes a bit too loudly for him to concentrate on his crossword puzzle.

Anyway, I just wanted to warn everyone about a new Communist insurgence. The Commies are infiltrating our homes and they're going to play their music TOO DAMN LOUD!