Where's the Beef?

My favorite game from college is one we invented called Where’s the Beef? It started after I brought a piece of steak home from the dining hall, subsequently forgot about it, then later found it more or less petrified. Having let it gone to waste, I resolved to put it to use, and Where’s the Beef? was born.

To play, the hider goes into a non-participant’s dorm room with the beef in eir pocket, strikes up a conversation with the room’s dweller, and while this resident isn’t paying attention, hides the beef somewhere in the room. Once the beef is successfully concealed, the hider shouts loudly, “WHERE’S THE BEEF?!” This battle cry alerts a crew of about five people secretly standing just outside the door to come find the beef. These beef-seekers jog into the room in a single file line while rhythmically clapping and chanting, “Where’s. The. Beef. Where’s. The. Beef.” If done correctly, the room’s inhabitant doesn’t even know beef is hidden in eir room, so it becomes quite puzzling as a handful of people start rummaging through your personal possessions chanting something about beef. Of course, it is against the rules to explain what is unfolding until after the beef has been found, since half the fun is watching the game’s unwitting host grow flabbergasted, then ultimately confused when a piece of beef does indeed turn out to be hidden in the room.

It’s best to play this game in the rooms of acquaintances, since that provides enough of a reason to invite yourself in without rising much suspicion and they tend to more readily brush it off as an amusing experience afterwards, though it has been known to work with strangers, too. The reaction of the patsy varies: some laugh at the experience, some want to play the game as well, and some find it gross. (“Ew, did you really put beef under my pillow?”) Regardless, everyone’s a winner when playing Where’s the Beef?