Car Drama

Madeleine's back in California and still as charming as ever.

Madeleine on having to go to court after being hit by a drunk driver: "They asked to have him not put away because he dresses as a clown at a children's hospital on the weekends and runs an Orange Julius. I'm sorry but no one wants to see his scary 60-year-old face in make up. It was his third DUI, I don't feel bad for him."

On her new used car: "I had a weird encounter with some high schoolers the other day. They pulled up next to me and made mustaches with their fingers and stuck their tongues out. I did it back to them and flipped them off. Why would they do that to me? When did I stop becoming their peer? Maybe it's because my car has a bumper sticker that says 'Pro-siesta and I vote.'"

On the reason for that bumper sticker: "I guess the last guy who owned it liked to take naps and vote. He had a bunch of stickers that I can't get off. Also, he had a tracheotomy and spoke through a hole in his throat, so the front windshield has a sticker that alerts police that if the driver is in an accident he cannot scream for help since he doesn't have vocal cords."