The highlight of the evening was our second annual white elephant game. We didn't put dirty socks on our faces this time, and there was no gift quite as despised as the yarn choirboy, but there was still some old fashioned gift stealing. This year, guests were asked to contribute something used or secondhand to the game.
Some highlights:
* Sisco cashed out immediately with a handheld electronic Yahtzee game.
* Amber exited merrily with a Dora the Explorer bicycle basket.
* Laura won an audio cassette tape of an NPR special in Spanish called Los Hijos de los Alcoholics, or The Children of Alcoholics.
* Allison chose a $5 voucher to Chilis, which Shea originally obtained when he was served a bowl of soup with a piece of paper in it.
* Shea won Pick-Up Stix
* Jessica won a necklace, or more specifically, a doll on a chain. Given that it is remarkably ostentatious, no one else competed with her for it. She put it on immediately.
* The most sought after item was a wooden statuette of a flamingo wearing a bikini. When I spotted it at a thrift store a couple hours earlier, I couldn't stop laughing at it, it brought me such joy. Even after its head broke off, people still wanted it, thus it was exchanged hands more than anything else. Finally, Kline lucked out, leaving the rest of us to settle for other things.
* I got stuck with a paddle ball. I think that toy is fun, I suppose, but it gets repetitive. Fortunately, Allison solved that problem by breaking it soon after.
* Worst of all, Stacy was left with trading card-like photos of fabric artwork. Only upon the game's conclusion did she reveal the unfortunate coincidence that the artwork was done by a college nemesis.
The best item of all, however, was another great thrift store find, an exercise VHS by the name of Dancin' Grannies. Katy managed to snag the gem in the game. I thought the beauty of the tape would be in the cover, but as it turned out, it was amazing in numerous ways. Later in the evening, I passed out on the couch earlier than the others, but I awoke to see no fewer than eight intoxicated people enthusiastically trying to keep up with the Dancin' Grannies. The exercisers, all real grandmothers, are energetic, wrinkly freaks of nature. They wear tight pink spandex and keep perfect(ly creepy) smiles plastered on their faces in a Stepford Wives fashion no matter how challenging the work out becomes. The dialogue is hokey. Sometimes strenuous, always silly, the steps are a hoot.
I found a clip of the Dancin' Grannies on YouTube, though it is without the original soundtrack. The quality isn't great, and unfortunately the frightening smiles are lost in the blur, but the hot granny moves remain intact. Watch as they wiggle their hips. Observe as they lift bags of frozen vegetables as weights. Applaud as they shuffle to the side. Fatties rejoice, your salvation is here.
1 comment:
omg, i've seen this before. my mom used to run a senior center and part of her duties included a workout program. she bought this tape and used many of the routines at the center. i used to skip school and go into work with my mom where i would do these workouts with like 40 old people.
Post a Comment