Why does Santa never finish his cookies? Every time I see photos of "Santa was here!" it shows a couple of bites taken out of the cookies with a bunch of leftovers. Surely in all of his travels, he knows that there are kids around the world who are starving and would love to finish those cookies. Fair enough if he thinks he's already too fat to eat them, but couldn't he at least bring the cookies with him and leave them at one of the homes with less fortunate children?
Of course not. This is the same man who gives gifts to children that are proportional to their parents' income levels. Ever notice how it's only the richest kids who Santa gives things like trampolines and ponies while impoverished kids are lucky to get a second-hand doll or ball? And we're supposed to believe that somehow it's a meritocracy based on kids behavior, as if the wealthiest kids are always the nicest and poorest kids are the naughtiest?
Fuck a Santa, he's in cahoots with the 1%.