Reinventing Hangman

While we were out to hear some live music on a Friday night, the paper table cloth bred several games of hangman. As usual, inevitably the guesser accuses the hanger of spelling a word wrong off a bad assumption that the incorrectly-assumed word must be what the hanger meant to put. I'm an English teacher, folks: I no how too spel.

Then, in an insight that could only be discovered at a bar, I questioned the very institution of hangman. Sure, it's a time-tested game, but does it really make sense?

For instance, as soon as you guess one letter incorrectly, you have this:

A disembodied head hanging from a rope. Who considers decapitation a victory?

One more letter:

Gets you this. This quadrepalegic was probably suffering already. Hanging him only adds insult to injury. It's gross and this is not what I consider winning. In fact, it seems like you get closer to failing, the better it gets for the poor guy. Once you lose, you finally have a complete man. Tell me that's not succeeding. From now on, I'm guessing all Q's and Z's until that man is whole.

I suggest an alternate way of playing hangman. Let's reinvent the wheel. Start with a man... a whole man even!

One incorrect letter builds a platform...

While each incomplete letter...

Brings the man...


To death.

And finally the noose that does him in. Now you really lose!

You can also generously add an optional seventh round where he's not dead until his eyes turn to cartoonish X's.

There. I bet you'll never play hangman the same way again.


Anonymous said...

you shouldn't even have a platform, seeing that the man is just standing on the ground with a rope around his neck, hes not actually getting hung now is he?
~ you're very smart sister

Anonymous said...

Or you could play starting with a whole man, and for every letter wrong, you could take away a limb. Or an organ.
However this would require the use of white-out or an eraser, neither of which frequent my desk.