For Halloween, I dressed as a member of the Illumanti.
Actually, I was a Clue board. It was a last minute costume. I asked my Facebook friends whether I should be a Clue board or a SEXY Clue board and, obviously everyone voted for sexy. I didn't know how to actually pull that off, but I did suggestively tape the "CONFIDENTIAL" folder that you put the cards in over my crotch.
I tried to up the sex appeal in this photo I posed for just before going out. I know how to work my angles from my brief employment at America's Next Top Model. I'm holding a knife, but it's hidden behind my hat, so clearly I wasn't there long enough to learn all of my angles, unfortunately.
On the streets of Hollywood, no one wanted to take my picture this year, not that I expected it. This was a subpar costume. To make matters worse, the cards and pieces I had taped all over my body kept falling off over the course of the night. You could have collected an almost complete Clue game if you had followed behind me.
But at least I wasn't Mario and Luigi. Half of Hollywood was dressed as those two characters. That and Waldo. When you can plainly spot three different Waldos in your general vicinity, it really takes the fun out of the game.
The most interesting part of the night was when some not-totally-sane man came up to me and said, "I get you, I get you, you've got a CLUE! I know what you mean. I've got a clue, too, man, but you shouldn't put it out there like that." He then lifted up his shirt to reveal a second shirt underneath and winked. "We each got clues, but we shouldn't give clues to other people that we have those clues, you know what I mean?"
I didn't know what he meant, but he rambled on, occasionally lifting his shirt, which had some cryptic text. "Look, man, I know you can't talk about it, but I know you're in the Illumanati. As you can see from my shirt, I am too. But I gotta say, when you wear that clue out like that, you're too obvious, people are going to figure it out." I just kept agreeing with him because what else was I going to do?
So apparently my last minute board game costume was accidentally semi-covert Illumanti attire. Who knew? Maybe it was a better costume than I thought.
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