Understanding the Understudy

As a teen, I participated as part of the backstage crew on a few youth theater performances by constructing, painting, and moving sets. My friend Jen was acting in the show, though she didn't have a large part. In the week leading up to opening night, I noticed Jen was studying the script. Since she only had a few lines, I made an inquiry and discovered that she was actually the understudy for the lead role. I told her that that seemed like a lot of work just to be a back up, to which Jen agreed but said she had pretty much learned all of the lines anyway "just in case." That's when I started joking, "So if something were to happen to Lauren [the lead], you would get to perform?" "Yeah," she said. Then, doing my best mobster impression, I slammed my fist into my open palm in a menacing manner and promised to "see what I can do." Appreciating my joke, Jen laughed and thanked me.

The following night, now just two days before the show's opening night, the director gathered everyone to give some bad news. Lauren, the lead, had been injured and was in the hospital with two broken ribs. I immediately felt awful, partially because Lauren was seriously hurt, and partially because I was afraid that Jen might think I was somehow responsible after the vague threats I made in jest the night before, especially given the lack of explanation as to how Lauren was injured.

I tried to find Jen immediately to make sure she didn't actually suspect me of anything, but she was already busy going through scenes as the newly promoted understudy. It wasn't until the end of the night that we finally caught up. Our conversation used as few words as possible, but we conveyed what we needed to convey:

Jen: So...
Kevin: No!!
Jen: Yeah...
Kevin: Yeah.
Jen: I didn't think you would, it's just...
Kevin: We had that conversation, so you'd...
Jen: Yeah...
Kevin: But yeah, no.
Jen: Good.
Kevin: Well, congratulations anyway.
Jen: Yeah, ha, thanks, I guess.

It was one of those funny scenarios where I would have not only been offended if she thought that of me, but also a bit if she hadn't at least wondered. I can be tough and evil, right? Jen didn't really think I would do that, and I didn't really think she would think I would do that, but the situation necessitated at least articulating this, however poorly, as confirmation.

As it turned out, Lauren was out of the hospital by the next day and, even with broken ribs, was determined to play the part. The crew did some last minute changes to the choreography and stage directions to accommodate Lauren's injuries, so Jen never even got her big shot at stardom.

I learned a lesson from all of this:
Next time, I won't settle for simply maiming... BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!