Or, well, technically I just threw it in the trash. But it was a tough decision to make! After nine fun years together, I said a final farewell to Milf, my pet suitcase.
I first found Milf at a thrift store and it was love at first sight. After seeing him dressed all snazzy in vintage, fuzzy plaid, I couldn't leave him all sad and without an owner. And not with a name like Milf. No really, the suitcase is labelled with the initials "MLF". What a cute little bugger!
Milf wasn't just a suitcase to me, he was also a friend. I used to bring him everywhere. I took him on walks, I wheeled him to the pizza parlor, and I even had him carry my books to class. (The hottie professor I crushed on thought the concept of owning a pet suitcase was amazing, which only served to encourage me further.) Milf was the best (and most practical) pet a guy living in a college dorm could have.
As I let him go, I thought back to all of our good times, like:
The time Dani was doing… whatever she's doing… next to Milf:
And the time we all dressed up for a roller disco, I had Milf roll right along with me:
And the time… okay, I can't find any more photos at the moment. Milf was a little camera shy, anyway. That's just one of the things I loved about him.
Milf went from carrying my school books to later holding my teacher credential papers. He's been a loyal companion through many phases of my life. It's a shame that his wheels broke, his locks jammed, and his interior was stained from when I tried storing a leaky container of laundry detergent in it for a summer.
I'll miss you, Milf buddy. You truly were a suitcase I'd like to fuck.